What Do You Do with a Dead Cat?
The cat fails to see the humor in it…
This is another one of those recalled books or stories from my past. That book is 101 Uses for a Dead Cat. Afterall, what do you do with a dead cat? Well, there's this book called 101 Uses for a Dead Cat by Simon Bond. It's basically a collection of darkly humorous cartoons that answer the question, "What do you do with a dead cat?" The illustrations depict various imaginative and morbid ways to repurpose a deceased feline, such as using it as a bottle holder or a pencil sharpener. It's a classic example of black comedy that has entertained readers with its outrageous and sometimes shocking humor. This book was written in 1981.
What Do You Really Do With a Dead Cat?
This book doesn’t address this dilemma. It covers repurposing a dead cat—Not proper disposal of.
Reflecting on the peculiarities of life, I recently pondered, "What does one truly do with a deceased cat?" This thought was spurred by the passing of my beloved Ernie last October. In my quest for answers, I turned to Copilot, seeking guidance on the proper protocols for pet aftercare. According to the information provided, my dear Ernie, the ginger tabby, now rests peacefully beneath our garden's apple tree. This led me to wonder: Should I consider exhuming and relocating his remains to adhere to official guidelines?
1. At-Home Burial
Many areas allow pet burials on private property, but some require specific depth requirements (typically 3-4 feet deep) to prevent scavengers from digging up remains.
Some cities/counties prohibit home burials due to groundwater contamination concerns.
Some areas require a biodegradable container or burial at a certain distance from water sources, homes, and property lines.
2. Cremation
Private cremation (individual, where you receive ashes).
Communal cremation (group cremation, no ashes returned).
Many veterinary offices offer cremation services, or you can contact a pet crematory directly.
3. Veterinary Disposal
Most veterinarians offer pet disposal services for a fee, either through cremation or medical waste disposal.
4. Pet Cemeteries
Some areas have designated pet cemeteries where you can have a formal burial with a marker.
5. Animal Control / Local Services
In urban areas, you can often contact animal control or sanitation departments to remove a deceased pet, similar to roadkill pickup.
6. Landfill Disposal
Some regions allow pet remains to be wrapped and disposed of in municipal landfills, but check local laws first.
7. Aquamation (Water-Based Cremation)
A newer, eco-friendly method using alkaline hydrolysis to break down remains, available in some locations.
Regulations to Check:
✅ State & Local Laws – Some states require permits for home burial or prohibit it entirely.
✅ HOA/Community Rules – Some neighborhoods restrict pet burials on private property.
✅ Environmental Protection Laws – Preventing contamination of water supplies.
In Pennsylvania, including Pittsburgh, specific regulations govern the disposal of deceased pets to ensure public health and environmental safety. Here's a concise overview:
1. Disposal Timeline:
Deceased animals must be disposed of within 48 hours of death.
2. Acceptable Disposal Methods:
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Burial:
Permitted on private property, provided it complies with state guidelines.
The burial site should be:
At least 100 feet away from water sources, wells, and property lines.
Covered with a minimum of two feet of soil.
Located outside the 100-year floodplain.
Ensure the site is not visible to the public.
Cremation:
Available through veterinary services or specialized pet crematories.
For instance, Pittsburgh Pet Cremation offers such services.
Rendering:
Involves a service that processes animal remains.
Providers must be licensed by the Pennsylvania Department of Agriculture.
Landfill Disposal:
Some municipal landfills accept animal remains.
Contact local facilities to confirm acceptance and any specific requirements.
3. Transportation of Deceased Animals:
When transporting, ensure the remains are contained appropriately to prevent exposure to other animals or the public.
Transportation should not pose a threat to public health or the environment.
4. Local Regulations:
While state laws provide a framework, local ordinances may impose additional requirements or restrictions.
It's advisable to consult with local authorities or the Allegheny County Health Department to ensure full compliance.
Adhering to these guidelines ensures the respectful and lawful handling of your pet's remains, maintaining both public health and environmental standards.
A Pencil Sharpener
Ways to repurpose a dead cat.